


Songstuck Drabbles

by MissMorland



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drug Use, Humanstuck, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Minor Violence, Multi, Non-Graphic Violence, Recreational Drug Use, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-03
Updated: 2014-04-03
Packaged: 2018-01-18 01:21:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1409761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMorland/pseuds/MissMorland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From the music challenge - shuffle your playlist and write a drabble for the first five songs</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Say A Prayer

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for the sads
> 
> but that's like
> 
> all I write

John's fingers tightened in Dave's shirt as he sniffled, his quiet sobs wracking his bruised body. 

"Dave?"

At the sound of John's voice, soft and broken, whispering his name, Dave drew him closer. His arms tightened around his waist gently, holding him close protectively. _Can't believe I let this happen..._

"Dave, when are things going to get better?"

Dave's breath caught at the words. For the first time, he was caught off guard by a question--he didn't know.  He didn't know when they could go in public and hold hands without getting the looks, without being spat on. He didn't know when they could go on a normal date, a real date, without worrying what the people at the next table over were saying. Hell, Dave didn't know how long it would be before he could hold his boyfriend's hand in public without--

John sniffed again, and Dave gently wiped away the bit of blood that had begun to collect on John's forehead again.  "I don't know," he whispered, pressing a kiss to John's forehead. 

_I'm sorry._

"I don't know."


	2. Hurt - Nine Inch Nails

"Gamzee!"

The glass of the needle crunched under Karkat's foot as he lurched to Gamzee's side. As soon as his hands touched Gamzee's shoulders he could feel them shaking with the trip, the potent drug swelling his veins and making his fingers tremble.  

_notagain notagain oh god please, not--_

"Gamzee, you said you would stop!"

Karkat realized he was shaking too, tears threatening to spill from his eyes as he kicked away the palm-sized plastic bag. Nondescript white powder trailed across the floor, the rest of the stash he hadn't had a chance to melt down yet. But enough was gone to make his pupils huge, his eyes half-lidded by contrast."You said you were done with this!" 

Gamzee looked up at him, focusing on his face after a moment of vacant staring. His hoarse voice was barely a whisper. "I fucked it up, Karkat." 

Karkat hovered in a dreamlike state, still unwilling to believe this was really happening again. "Of course you did, dumbass!" he yelled, shaking him. "You said you were going to stop!" 

"No," Gamzee insisted, and Karkat stopped, still feeling surreal.  

"I motherfucking fucked it up, Karkat." 

Then, after another long pause, he began to laugh. Long, breathless, and howling, his body wracked with laughter like he was sobbing. And then Karkat realized he was, tears making messy trails through his makeup as he rocked back and forth, shredding his throat with laughter like he'd just said the funniest thing he'd ever heard.  

Karkat was frozen, dumbstruck. Gamzee spread his arms wide, gesturing grandly to his entire apartment. The burned-out lightbulbs, the stained and peeling wallpaper. The neglected carpet crusted with regret God only knew what. "Look at this," he laughed. "See my motherfuckin' kingdom? I rule in this motherfucker." He laughed again and choked, hacking for a moment. Karkat pressed his hand flat against Gamzee's back, wondering what the hell was going on.  

When Gamzee spoke again, the tears were more evident in his voice. "This is all I have." 

And suddenly he was roaring. "AND I RULE IT!" 

He turned to Karkat, and Karkat thought he'd never seen anything sadder in his entire life. Gamzee's face was broken, his eyes stained red with the trip and his crying, and looking like the saddest clown in the world. "I'm sorry, Karkat," he whispered. "I'm sorry I don't have better to give you." 

Karkat couldn't say a word as Gamzee broke down in sobs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry not sorry
> 
> this is my headcanon song for them
> 
> because I have this elaborate AU in my head where Karkat and Gamzee are living like Roger and Mark in Rent and Karkat keeps begging Gamzee to stop and he can't


	3. Honeybee - Steam Powered Giraffe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm not sorry

Equius opened his eyes blearily, sleep still clouding his vision as he looked around. Dusk was falling over the scattered tombstones. Had he fallen asleep here again?

He sat up straighter, shivering a little against the cold marble tombstone at his back. He'd need to start bringing a jacket when he visited--it was getting chillier at night. And visiting every day, he couldn't risk getting sick. 

Equius could still remember the days when his daily visits weren't to a graveyard. 

He remembered the way she'd smile when she opened her door and saw him. God, her smile--it was like all the joy in the world was beaming on him. Her whole face showed it, her eyes, her lips, everything. She'd throw her arms around his neck, giggling and choosing to ignore how much he'd sweat just at her touch. When they made love, her kisses were sweet and tender, her fingers delicate and gentle, her gaze loving and kind. And after, when she'd lie in his arms, bare and vulnerable and warm next to him, when her breath was soft on his chest and her fingers splayed on his side, as if to say, _don't leave, I want you_ \--his heart would swell and swell, and he thought he'd die if he didn't have her. 

But here he was. Alive. It had been four years. 

He still couldn't let her go. 

Some days, when she felt much, much farther than the six feet between them, he'd find himself wishing he'd never met her. As much happiness as she'd granted him, as much emptiness as she'd filled, he could hardly bear this constant dull ache that even her memory couldn't assuage. 

That's all Feferi was anymore--a memory. A memory that had him tied up and weighed down with grief. 

Equius wished with all his heart that he could be free of it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i'm a little sorry for this one


	4. Turn Back the Clock - Steam Powered Giraffe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had to work in some AU stuff here, Dave's a robot heh
> 
> so are John and Dirk but besides that it's humanstuck

If robots could blush, Dave had done it the first day he'd seen Terezi Pyrope. 

The little girl had watched his show in fascination with an ear-to-ear grin. That smile could light the stars, he thought. He sang directly to her, and she smiled wider. 

After the show, she came bouncing to the side of the stage, hoping to catch a glimpse of the amazing singing robots. Dirk hustled over to shoo her away, but Dave stopped him. He knelt by her side, and she touched his cold metal face eagerly. He asked her age; she held up three fingers on each hand. She told him how much she'd liked their music, how much she admired his cherry red jacket, how for her last birthday her mother had given her a little music box that she cherished dearly. He bent his artificial ear close to her lips to hear her hum its tune for him. 

Her mother called. She touched his face again and whispered, "Bye," before scurrying off to meet her parents. Dave watched her go. 

Seasons passed--years, then. Dave and his band returned to the large town they'd visited that day. As he sang of a love he didn't know, he scanned the crowd for the same sweet smile. And there it was--under a pair of red sunglasses, her gaze fixed vaguely on a spot far to his left. But she was smiling. 

After the show, he waited by the backstage curtains for her. This time, her presence was announced by a sharp tap-tap, and she nudged the curtains aside with her cane. She stood for a moment, her eyes unfocused and blank, then tapped carefully forward. When she heard the brief clang of her cane on Dave's foot, she smiled. When he guided her hand to his face, she smiled wider. 

She explained that she'd lost her vision in an accident a few years back. She didn't want to talk about it. She did, however, want to tell him how much she'd loved hearing them play again, and admire the feel of the jacket that he assured her was still cherry red. Before she left, she dug into the red bag that hung at her side like she'd nearly forgotten something. She drew out a small wooden box, painted with silvery-teal dragons, and held it out to him. She made sure he had a hold on it before letting go, lest her lack of vision betray her as it had so many times before. She left smiling, arm-in-arm with a petulant-looking man with black hair and a sour face. 

He opened the box once he could no longer watch her retreating figure. The same tune from years ago poured from inside, a small teal-clad ballet dancer spinning. Harmonies rose in his throat, but he swallowed them, wanting to hear only the box's simple tune, unadulterated. 

More years passed. Dave urged Dirk and John to bring their show back to the same city. They laughed at him for falling in love with a human girl, but smiled when he brought out the music box. At night he lay in his bed, listening to its melody over and over. 

Finally John and Dirk agreed, and they returned to the town he'd met his beloved human girl. He sang of a love he knew well now, and gazed down at the crowd, searching for her smile. This time it took him much longer to locate the shining grin, and when he did, he was confused. The grin was on a little girl's face, sitting on her father's shoulders. Her eyes were wide and bright, their blue-green color a stark contrast against her father's raven-black hair. As far as he knew, humans didn't age backwards.

This wasn't his girl. 

Where was she?

Where had she gone?

Dave waited by the curtain after the show, the music box in his lap, listening for the tap-tap of her cane or a peal of her laughter. Through a crack in the curtain, he could see the little girl pass by with her father. She didn't turn to look. 

He returned again, a few years later. The little girl had grown, but there was no sign of his girl. Where had she gone? Had she left? Had she left him?

Dave sat up all night by the curtains, the music box repeating its cheery melody as long as he wound it. The music box was reliable--as long as he kept it tightly wound, and treated it gently, it would always work. Wouldn't it? So why wasn't his girl the same?

Years after, the music box's tune slowed. It dropped in pitch as he listened, sinking lower and slower. And years after that, when he wound it it played nothing. Even the dancer didn't spin, facing resolutely backward. The gears weren't maintained, the moving parts weren't oiled and checked. Such is the way of uncared for machinery. 

And years after that, Dave stopped moving too. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one's kinda long but there's a lot more to this song than to the others, it tells an entire story instead of just part of it


	5. Falling - The Civil Wars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as soon as I saw this one, my first thought was "Tavris"
> 
> my second thought was "shit"

Vriska's heart sank at the sound of her name. 

She turned at his voice. Forced a smile. Pushed away the scowl she'd been concealing. She pretended she wasn't feeling like her stomach had dropped fifty feet at her name, like her chest was suddenly painfully devoid of anything beating. 

"Hey, Tav."

The innocent smile on his face was enough make her innards fall another hundred feet. He was so happy to see her. She pretended to feel the same as he wheeled closer, and pretended not to shiver as she bent to embrace him. 

"I missed you, Vriska!" he exclaimed, his skinny arms looped around her neck. She pretended his touch didn't make her feel cold all over, and she pretended she didn't feel a hot knot of guilt in her stomach as he pulled her closer. She nodded vaguely and murmured something to the same effect, pretended she wasn't lying through her teeth. She pulled away sooner than she normally would, and more awkwardly. He didn't notice. 

She wondered when she'd be able to work up the gall to stop pretending.

As Tavros chattered animatedly to her about things she'd stopped caring about, as that knot in her stomach made her feel like she was falling forever, Vriska pretended she still loved him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so not sorry for that one


End file.
